“What Happened to Tracy?”
If you have been wondering “What happened to Tracy?”, your not alone. I have been asking myself that same question. The answer is “I moved from NW Iowa to Central Oregon.” I’m still trying to decide whether I lost myself or found myself during this transition. All I know is that Rudolf Clausius is correct. The entropy of the Universe does tend to maximum.
My husband left the only home he has ever known. He wanted to maintain control and have a smooth transition from one location to the next. Being a spiritual philosopher and having moved several times myself, I knew that having a smooth controlled move was highly unlikely. Just by making the decision to move, we had released control to the Universe.
Control is a particle state of being. It is about conformity and sameness. By making the decision to move, we were letting go of sameness for change. Change is the wave state of existence and a spiritual experience. It is about the possibilities of the Universe and possibilities means disorder. It is a good thing that I wrote a book about this called “i-matter”. I had to refer to it several times to remind myself that this is all part of a spiritual journey.
Just like the beginning of Chapter 8 in my book “i-matter”, the journey began with people. As soon as word got out about our move, all sorts of people began to come over. Some came to wish us well. Others came to discourage us, and some just wanted our stuff. I had to keep reminding myself what I wrote in my book.
My husband was very good at this concept of non-attachment. “Nay-Sayers” were very quick to point out all the negative aspects of buying a house online, but my husband didn’t let it phase him. He pointed out how we were more courageous than them and how our strengths will make this journey a success. He is correct. We went from an idea at the end of April to moving into the house we want to buy just two months later. Not letting other people’s thoughts and emotions influence our thoughts and emotions made this move possible.
“Letting Go of Frosty”
The people from our past were not the only thing we had to let go of. We also had to let go of the animals in our lives. This was the hard part for my husband. We breed and raise Quarter horses. My husband loves all his horses. We couldn’t take all of them. We needed to let some go. The most difficult to let go was “Frosty”.
Frosty is a blue roan mare that lives up to her name. Her color is as frosty as a beautiful Christmas morning. We purchased Frosty as a yearling. As soon as we got her home, we knew something was wrong. No one could get near her. She was frightened of everything. We decided that she had a rough first year of life and needed to make her feel safe.
I spent the next 3 months earning Frosty’s trust. I would stand for hours in her pen waiting for her to come up to me. Finally, one day she did. The next step was getting her used to being haltered and then trained to lead. Soon she was doing whatever we asked of her. By the time she was 2 years old, she was well trained in ground work. She still showed signs of anxiety and we decided that it was best for everyone to not train her to be ridden. She had such a great color and disposition that my husband thought she would make a great brood mare.
After a few years of searching, he found a blue roan stud to breed her with. She did great. The breeders loved her. Then on the day we were to take her home, the breeder noticed something in her eye. We called the vet and sure enough Frosty was going blind.
We were heart broken. This poor horse had gone through enough tough times. We wanted to make her comfortable during this transition of sight to blindness. We created a special yard for her so she couldn’t hurt herself and trained her to follow voice cues to help her find food and water. We were amazed at her courage and strength. Her intelligence helped her navigate the yard with ease. We knew she would be a great mother when her foal was born.
Then came the move. I knew that traveling across the Rocky Mountains with Frosty wouldn’t be easy for her, specially with a new foal to be born a few weeks before the move. I found a “horse rescue farm” that would take her and her foal. I just needed my husband to “let go” of his emotional needs and do what was best for Frosty. He invested a lot of love into her and would have to let go of that investment. It was hard for him, but in the end he did what was best for her.
Frosty is now in South Dakota with a healthy, happy colt. We miss her but are happy she and her colt are doing well.
I have many more things to share about this Spiritual undertaking called “moving” that I will share in my next article.
If there is something, you would like to share, feel free to send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org or you can find me on twitter @SohlTracy.
And don’t forget to check out my webpage www.i-matter.org. I am working hard on getting the forum up and running.
Until next time – Live Intelligently